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THE BOOK OF THE WHORES THEIR LIVES AND TEACHINGS Thirty nine years of peace between the Lamanites and Nephites ends with escalating tensions which ultimately lead up to the Mount Balsac Massacre, and Laman's Title of Vengeance. The whores give final words of wisdom before they die of old age. The plates are given to the people, and later buried, to be preserved for future generations. CHAPTER 1 Thirty nine years of peace existed between the Lamanites and Nephites. The Lamanite population grows rapidly in numbers because of their sexual freedoms. The Nephite population grows slowly because of their chastity. Lemuel's seed is choice above all other seed. Two Nephite home teachers attempt to teach the monthly lesson to Laman. Laman threatens to behead them. [Around 550 BC] 1. And I Yi Ping shall commence the first chapter of mine, and mine daughters book. For it is that much time hath passed since I did last engrave words upon these plates, yea, even many years, for the snows have come and gone many times, and the moon hath grown big and round, and shrunken small again many times over. Wherefore, it must needs be that I catch thee up on our story. For when it was that I last engraveth words upon these plates, yea, we had commenced our new lives under the rule of Laman. 2. And many years hath passed, and the Lamanite people do grow in numbers. For we service the men well, and we hath born them many children, yea, even me and my daughters, even hath we born eighty and seven children amongst us. And the other Lamanite women do also bear many children. 3. And it came to pass that we do mostly service Lemuel, for Lemuel’s seed is choice above all other seed. But yea, we do also service other Lamanite men, for fair and just are we, and we do fornicate any man who desires to know us. 4. And the other Lamanite women do also bear many children, and inasmuch as me and mine daughters hath carried the seed of their husbands, and know their husbands often, yea, the other Lamanite women are jealous not. For the Lamanites, because of the teachings of Laman and Lemuel, doth believe in free love and open marriage. And the other Lamanite women do often carry Lemuel's seed, which is choice above all other seed, and their husbands be not jealous, for it is acceptable amongst Lamanites to share seed. 5. And Lemuel hath planted his seed in all the women of the village, and we did often carry the seed of all the Lamanite men of the village. And all the seeds and fluids of the village did mix, and the Lamanites hath become as one. And all the children of the village doth have beautiful dark skin, like unto Lemuel, and our Asian blood flows through their veins. 6. And the eighty and seven children were raised by all, for it takes a village to raise a child, even doth it take a village to raise eighty and seven children, and even hundreds more from the other Lamanite women. And our children begat more children, and their children begat children also. And we haveth a goodly village. 7. And it came to pass that the Nephites did also grow in numbers, but their population doth grow slowly, for Nephi maketh laws against free love and open marriage, which thing doth limit the Nephite population growth. And the Nephites do believe mixing of seed and fluids between those not bound in marriage, even knowing multiple partners, to be a wicked perversion. For according to the Nephite teachings, David and Solomon did have many wives and concubines which thing was bad, according to their teachings. 8. And inasmuch as the Nephite population grew not fast, yea, nevertheless, Nephi was a skilled builder. And the land of Nephi hath grown into a large city, with large and spacious buildings, like unto Jerusalem. 9. And the Lamanites had not amongst them a person with the skills of masonry, nor of architecture. Wherefore, the Lamanites dwell in teepees. And we do live the simple life, for we are hunters and gatherers. Nevertheless, we are exceedingly happy. 10. And we do live in peace, for neither the Nephites nor the Lamanites desired war. Nevertheless, Laman was exceedingly concerned, even was Laman paranoid of Nephi's power, for Nephi turneth Lemuel's skin dark. 11. And because he doth fear Nephi's great powers, yea, Laman maketh many swords and shields, which were weapons of war, or rather, weapons of peace which are used for war, and Laman did also train many Lamanite men in the art of war so as to be prepared for the day that Nephi attacks. 12. And it came to pass that in the commencement of the thirty and ninth year of the reign of Laman over the Lamanites, yea, and after thirty and nine years of peace amongst the Lamanites and Nephites, and after Laman hath built up much anxiety, and many swords for the day Nephi shall attack, yea, two Nephite men, one old, and one young, came upon the Lamanite village. 13. And this thing did cause much anxiety, for many anticipated the day that Nephi shall attack. And many Lamanite men moved quickly to their positions when they beheld the two Nephites approach, and the Lamanite men gathered their weapons for war. 14. And after the manner in which the Lamanite men prepared for battle, yea, the son of Abitch spake, even did he give wise counsel unto Laman: Behold, Laman, it is obvious that the Nephites desire not war. For it is that there be only two Nephites who approach our village, and unarmed do they appear. Wherefore, stand down thy army, and receive them as guests. For it is that peace hath existed with the Nephites for thirty and nine years. Wherefore, Nephi desires not war, and it shall be wisdom in thee to not start one. 15.And it came to pass that Laman, because he desired peace for his people, did agree to order not his army to attack. And the two Nephite men came upon the village unmolested, and Laman did greet them, and spake unto them, saying: Greetings Nephites. What is it that thou doth want? 16. And one of the Nephites, even the older one, answered Laman, and spake unto him: Behold, it is that we come in peace, and fellowship. For it is that we doth come to teach the word of Nephi unto Laman, who is rumored to live in this village. Wherefore, let us entereth thy fine village so as we can teach a lesson unto him? For it is that Nephi hath many wonderful and marvelous things to say, yea, even important things, and it is that we desire to bring the words of the prophet unto Laman, and to collect his tithing payment. Is it that we may speak unto Laman? 17. And Laman beheld the two men, and spake unto them, saying: Behold, thou hath spoken unto Laman, for I am he. And what is this thing that thou doth desire to speak of? Why doth thou desire to bringeth the message of my brother unto me? For me and the people of my village did reject his teachings long ago, even thirty and nine years ago. And we did chase Nephi out of this village. And we hath lived in peace for many winters, yea, even thirty and nine winters. And I do suspect this to be one of Nephi's tricks. Wherefore, I shall prepare my army, for the time of Neph's attack is soon at hand. And it is that I suspect thee of being spies, even spies who doth scout out this village for Nephi. 18. And the older Nephite, who did speak before, spake again, saying: Behold Laman my friend, 'tis not a trick, for Nephi doth teach a new teaching, even doth he teach that we must go out, two by two, and teach the things that he doth teach. And he doth assign partners, and maketh a list for each partnership, even names for us to teach. And on our list is thy name, Laman. 19. And Laman replied: Nephi doth maketh a mistake, for it is that I desire not to hear his teachings. Wherefore, take a message back to my little brother. Telleth him to taketh me off his teaching list, for I desire not to be bothered with such things. 20. And the two Nephites looked unto one another, and the talkative one spake again: Behold Laman, if that is what thou doth desire, we shall leave. For it is that we understand the commandments of god are exceedingly challenging. Nevertheless, the lord never said it would be easy, only that it would be worth it. Wherefore, is it that we can do anything for thee before we go? Is it that we can offer thee assistance in anything? For we are assigned to be of service unto thee in all things, both spiritual and temporal. 21. And Laman replied: Nay, for we do haveth it good here, and have no need for assistance from thee, or any other Nephite. 22. And the Nephite replied: Very well, have a good day, and we shall see thee next month. 23. And Laman answered: Behold, why wilt thou seest me again next month? 24. And the Nephite spake back at Laman: Yea, we do come monthly to teach the people whose names are written upon our list. 25. And Laman replied: Behold Nephite, doth thou hear not? For it is that I did just say unto thee to takest me off thy list. Is it that thou doth remembereth not that conversation? Nevertheless, it is that I shall see thee not next month, nor shall I see thee ever again. 26. And the Nephite answered: Yea, thou doth makest a good point about how thou did request thy name taken off the list. Nevertheless, it is that we shall taketh thy request to Nephi and he shall make the final decision. For it shall be not up to us to decide who shall be on the lists and who shall not be on the lists. For that shall be a decision that only the prophet can make. 27. And Laman spake: Nay, it is that thou art wrong, for it is that I get to decide what list I shall be on. Wherefore, if it shall come to pass that I see thee and thy partner again next month, behold, I shall remove thy heads with my sword and place them at the entrance of this village, even upon stakes, as a warning unto all Nephites. Doth thee understand? 28. And the Nephites became exceedingly frightened of Laman, even did they tremble with fear because of the threat he did make upon them, for Laman did threaten to smite off their heads with his sword. 29. And the Nephite who does speak replied unto Laman's threat: Behold, it is that we come in peace, and thou doth make threats against us. Wherefore, we shall return and report these things to the prophet Nephi, even shall we tell him of the threat thou did make unto us. And it is that he shall be exceedingly angry with thee for the things thou doth say. 30. And Laman replied: Behold, I care not that thou shall tell on me to Nephi. Wherefore, farewell Nephites. 31. And the two Nephites did turn and speedily run away in the direction of their village. 32. And this confrontation between the two Nephites and Laman doth begin the tensions between the Nephites and Lamanites, even tensions that shall lead to war between the two nations. |
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